I always thought they were kind of cute and harmless. Even when the ghastly March of the Penguins came out and my friend forced me at knifepoint to see it, I still didn't see the light. Thank god I stumbled across your tribe. Thank you. Thank you.
By the way, they eat fish. Is that part of the conspiracy? Should I just throw out that tin of Trader Joe's sardines, or should I open it and stake each one through its heart with a toothpick and then leave them for the raccoons? Please advise me, I'm scared.